As some of you may know, big fish angler Simon "Trawlerman" Davy, is away at sea
working for a lot of the year, but when he's not he's generally fishing...or
winding up his fellow fishermen.
On his return from sea this time, Simon brought a new "prop" for a classic
wind-up designed primarily for the Car Park syndicate members.
The wind-up played superbly on the curious & competitive nature of the male
species the CP boys became like lambs to the slaughter...
The wind up started the minute anyone asked "What is that?" of the
perfectly placed prop in Simon's swim - looking something like a brass smoking
instrument, it attracted attention almost immediately. Simon would then describe how they would use it on the ship, to measure
lung capacity prior to a dive. Simon then announced that he currently held the
record on his ship for maximum lung capacity - despite being a heavy smoker!
As you can imagine, this information automatically prompted the reply "Let
me have a go then" from the unknowing interested party. Simon would demonstrate initially (blowing in such a way so as not to give
the game away) and then passed over the tester to the eager victim, already
taking the hugest of breaths to prepare a real challenge to the record.
Directly on exhaling, the victim was covered in heavily perfumed talcum powder!
As a regular visitor to the shop (Yateley Angling Centre), the "victim" list unfolded daily, as
Simon "hit" more and more anglers - even managing to trick both Martin and Charly who work here!
But alas, the word quickly got round, and after tricking Joe Wright from Carpology mag, Simon knew
his wind-up would be exposed and it was time to pack the "lung tester" away.
Well not quite - I set him a challenge - YAC would donate £500 to Stoney & Friends, if Simon could "get" Chilly before the Yateley Fish In, and more importantly
capture it on camera. Only 24 hrs later and miraculously the "hit" was on.
Simon and his contraption were in the shop, when the big yellow pick up pulled up, and Chilly had arrived to pick up a few bits.
I was in my office at the time, when I received a call to say "Chilly's here, Simon's here, the lung tester is here, and we have a
camera ready - are you coming down to see it?" Well, to be honest I would have given the game away, I am rubbish at
containing the giggles, and my presence would have jeopardised the challenge.
The next I knew, the big fella was banging at my office door shouting "LOCKWOOD.........GET OUT HERE NOW!!!"
I could barely open the door for laughing, and fair play to Chilly, he was too!!
Guess I better watch my back now - but not a bad way to earn £500 for Macmillan - worth every penny!
Ruth Lockwood - July 2006
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